Our weekend

Sela was ecstatic to learn her literature entry for Reflections won an honorable mention at the district contest this weekend. The story she won with was "Fire Deer." It's such a great little story about a deer who can live in fire and how he found love in his heart. Only four people from her school received awards at the district level so we were really happy for Sela. We went out to dinner to celebrate. I was so proud of Sela I just had to have a coconut almond chocolate sundae to honor her.

Last night Zig and I were talking about something in hushed tones and the girls kept asking what it was. I said when you're twenty I'll tell you. I think I must have been on a kick with that line yesterday because I said it for something else..oh yeah, when you're twenty you can use the whole bottle of whipped cream, but for now mommy gets to choose how much you have. Anyway, the girls being quite clever went and dressed up in my clothes so they could look 20. They think they are soooo funny :)
Max is such an easy going pup...he was very willing to give his paw for the girls to make his paw print.

The chicken coup is coming along....

We had some nice sunny and clear weather today, although still very cool. We went outside as soon as we could and the kids stayed there until dusk playing their favorite pretend game, orphan children fending for themselves. They took skins off the trees and made paper and had all kinds of other provisions. Treela and Noah were over playing with girls.

We took some pictures of the chicken coop and dog house. The coop is huge, but half of it is for other uses.


The inside...a little loft up in the top.

This is the dog house. Still no dog, but the dog house is coming along nicely.

I wasn't prepared for this tonight

Tonight as I was putting Sela and Nina to bed, we were just lying there visiting in the dark for a bit. Nina then said, "Mom, Kaeli's mom is dead." Kaeli is a little girl in Nina's preschool. Kaelie's aunt (who is almost like another mother) died this week of cancer. She just had her first baby less than a year ago and last time I saw her (2 years ago), she was vibrant and healthy. I still can't believe it. Mrs. Judy told us all about it and said the kids may ask about it because Kaeli has talked about it quite a bit because the aunt (April) has been living with them.

Anyway, the girls had so many questions and I knew where the conversation would eventually lead. What is cancer? How do you get it? Who will nurse the baby if mommy is gone? Will you get cancer, Mom? Can a kid get cancer? I don't want you to die. I would miss you so much. Who would we call if you die? Dana, the neighbor? 911? Sela was helping answer Nina's questions and talking about her knowledge of heaven and how your spirit flitters up to heaven. Nina asked if we would still be with our families in heaven, the same family. I said yes. She said what if heavenly father accidentally drops me with another family.

Sela was pretty upbeat feeling like she was comforting Nina, when suddenly it hit her.....the real fear that if something could happen to April, then maybe something could happen to my mom. She then looked right at me and said "mom, I don't want you to die. I would miss you so much. Then her little face got all scrunched up and she started to just sob. It broke my heart. I comforted them as best I could, but no matter how much we talked of how wonderful heaven is, the thought of losing mom is too much. I can vividly remember these same fears as a child. Sleeping next to Mom's bed and holding her hand through the night, checking to make sure her heart was beating. We talked for awhile and got to a happier place..I assured them I was healthy that most people live long lives.

Nina said she wanted to say a prayer. Her prayer was "Dear Heavenly Father, please make April come alive, please don't let anyone else die, and please don't let anyone get lice. Amen" Then I prayed with the girls and hugged them tightly and said goodnight. Little angels. I didn't tell them, but my biggest fear as a mom is also dying and not being able to raise those sweet children. But, I suspect there are many moms who feel the same. Having children opens you up to some pretty intense feelings of love, fear, hope, and certainly vulnerability. It's not easy.

Squeaky Clean

What Sela, Nina and Rollin all love to do is prolong the time they can be naked running all over the house for as long as possible. Rollin being the first to dart off down the hall dripping wet. He is like a wild horse galloping aroud the room. He gets so hyper and happy after bathtime.

Caught him!
Sela is finally getting her two front teeth. She's growing up so fast.
I just had to snap this one.

Portrait of a 4 year old

I just took some pictures of Nina today, doing things she does most days. Dressing the way she does most days, and acting like the beautiful princess ballerina that she truly believes she is. Sela told her last week "Nina, you are the best ballerina who never took ballet lessons." Nina is so fortunate to have such a kind sister. She turned four over the break and it's been fun watching her really come into her own this past year. Her personality is definitely emerging. She is quite dramatic and emotional and full of life. When I think of Nina, the first thing I see is the sparkle in her eyes and the skip in her step. And of course, her little voice is something I just adore. She is always trying to put Zig and I in our place, which is funny or not so funny depending on the circumstances. A couple of days ago she said in a very exasperated voice, "Mom, you're not being respectable. Are your ears stuffed up? Can you hear me??" When she wants something, she wants it yesterday. That's our Nina. I can relate to her because I was something like her as a child, or so I'm told.

Welcome 2008

I'm a bit behind in welcoming the new year, but we've had a string of bad luck over the past few weeks....the latest being the dreaded stomach flu the kids and I all experienced over the weekend. It began with Rollin, next night Nina, the following night me and Sela. Zig barricaded himself up in the library and was very careful about handwashing and slept by himself. He was spared. I knew I'd get it. It's impossible not to hug and cuddle the kids when they are sick. Even though I knew I'd get it, I tried so hard to prevent throwing up by trying to lie down for 12 hours straight (it sometimes worked for Erin), but of course I was not so lucky. It wiped me out and I actually stayed in bed for 32 hours. But, one nice thing about the flu is it is over quick. I felt great come Sunday morning. Thank goodness, because boy is there some major deep cleaning to be done when the whole house is sick. Anyway, I feel like we all got a good cleanse to start the year off right.

I do have some goals for the new year. I haven't taken too much time to think about them yet but I always have several swimming around in my head at any given moment. One goal I have is to try and hold family home evening weekly. I kind of feel like every day is family home evening, so to make something formal seems funny sometimes, but the kids love a lesson and the whole program aspect of it, and it is a great moment for teaching and learning from each other. We do family home evenings from time to time but we are far from regular at them, so I know that while I might not be perfect at it, I can succeed in making significant improvement. We started tonight with a lesson on gratitude. We read about the ten lepers and talked about what happier people we are when we acknowledge blessings. I printed a crossword puzzle with questions about the story and the girls were able to answer every one. We had to make whole wheat chocolat chip cookies, of course, and then we began writing thank you notes for Christmas. Zig is out of town and Rollin was already in bed so it was just the girls.

I want to really get down a system for meal planning. I cook a lot and I enjoy it, but I want to plan better. I can come up with meals on the fly, but it is such a wonderful feeling to know what's on the menu in the morning and to have all the ingredients. It frees my mind up and it definitely saves time and energy.

I also want to get back in shape. I need all the energy I can get. I also need the break and alone time that comes with exercise, and all those endorphins. And a hard body. I think I'm still a year off from being able to get back into regular tennis at a club, but that is definitely in the plans. I am getting really anxious to play again.

My final goal is one I often think about and strive to do and that is to live in the moment. To be present as much as I can. To stop and look into the eyes of my children, to hold their little hands, to listen to their words, to touch and hold and smell them, and to savor these precious childhood moments. As a mother, I don't know if I can ever feel like I've done this well enough or often enough, but I'm happy trying. There is always something that needs to be done. Something I've accepted this year is that I will never be perfectly organized and do and be everything I have planned for myself with small children. I won't accomplish everything on my list, I will organize that dang craft closet probably 500 times or more when it's all said and done, but that's life with small children and that is the life I have chosen and the one I love. It wears me out, but there are amazing moments that can and do happen each day. I notice them more when I am not so busy and consumed with what needs to be done, so I continue to strive for balance and hope that it all works out.

Christmas 2007

A Few Highlights from the last couple of weeks in December....


Watching Nina and her schoolmates sing at Mrs. Judy's Christmas party.
Riding the monorail to the carousel in downtown Seattle and viewing the Gingerbread houses.


Making Gingerbread angels, houses, trees, and stars.


















Finally moving the girls back into their bedroom on Christmas Eve, after a three month family sleepover in the living room. Our floors are finally finshed.

Christmas morning

Waking up at 3am, going to San Diego and spending Christmas Day with Shamu, Babcia, Martin, Chris, and Clement at Sea World.
We now understand why no one sits in the front rows labeled wet zone. Just ask Rollin, you really do get wet, and it's pretty frightening for a little guy.
















Getting a surprise visit from the "real" Santa in California. He showed up on his way home and dropped off more gifts for the girls. They were stunned and weren't quite sure what to think. But I can tell you they definitely believe in Santa Clause.





















Learning that Sela has simplified her Christmas list for next year. Mom, I only want one thing from Santa next year. It will be real easy for him. Just one thing. A real live dolphin. Hmmm....

Meeting Boozer, the Serafin family's bull mastiff. Quite a dog. Huge, lazy, gentle, friendly and spoiled. He sleeps with a blankie. We all loved him. Nina misses "Boozie."



















Playing tennis at Babcia's house with the girls, and Martin, who is very good for only playing a handful of times.

Celebrating Nina's 4th Birthday with a bang. She had her special day all planned out in her head, and I'm really glad I asked her about it the day before. She wanted decorations and little balloons all around. She wanted to eat pancakes for breakfast and pizza for dinner. Musical chairs for the game. A carrot cake with frosting and fairies on top. Between Tina and I and the uncles, we gave her the party she had been dreaming of. She woke up to the dining area decorated with streamers and balloons (thanks Chris!) and pancakes. We went to California Pizza Kitchen for dinner and came home and ate cake and opened presents. Martin read to Nina from her new book until her eyelids got very heavy.





Nina loved the snow white dress-up from Tina.

















We played musical chairs the next evening with Martin providing the very lively music on the accordian. Everyone played along and it was so much fun. We let Nina win the first one and she was quite pleased.





















Bringing home 60 pounds of citrus in the form of the sweetest tangerines, lemons and oranges. Chris was so kind to pick all of these for us from the orchard at the Vista house. They are to die for and I want the supply to last forever, but we have already made a huge dent in it!














Discovering that after all that planning and shopping, the favorite toys, hands down, are three boxes we used to bring extra stuff home from San Diego. The kids have played with them every day since we've been home. They made three little houses and Nina has even slept in hers. They order snacks from them, and they have literally spent hours playing together, all three kids. They've also had some fun the vintage scarves I found at an estate sale for Nina. It's amazing what they can come up with using a simple box and some scarves.


















Well, these are a few of the fun moments of our incredibly busy December. Two birthdays in December makes things a little crazy. Come January 1st, I feel like I've just run a marathon. We love and miss you all, especially the family we weren't able to see this Christmas. You were in our thoughts.