Mother's Day Tea Party

Nina dressed me up for her tea party at school. She knew exactly what I was to wear...she went straight into my closet and did three rapid points with her finger....skirt, sweater, shoes. Done! So I wore it. I had never paired the whole ensemble together before, but it worked and she was happy and that was all that mattered for our special little tea. She made the hat and it was completely Nina-style. It looked like so many of the outfits she comes up with.

Are you ready to be a parent?

When I read this email sent by a friend (it could be one that has floated around for years, but it was a first for me) I laughed out loud (especially at the goat part), so I thought I'd share.

Lesson 1
1. Go to the grocery store.
2. Arrange to have your salary paid directly to their head office.
3. Go home.
4. Pick up the paper.
5. Read it for the last time.

Lesson 2
Before you finally go ahead and have children, find a couple who already are parents and berate them about their...
1. Methods of discipline.
2. Lack of patience.
3. Appallingly low tolerance levels.
4. Allowing their children to run wild.
5. Suggest ways in which they might improve their child's breastfeeding, sleep habits, toilet training, table manners, and overall behavior.
Enjoy it because it will be the last time in you r life you will have all the answers.

Lesson 3
A really good way to discover how the nights might feel...
1. Get home from work and immediately begin walking around the living room from 5PM to 10PM carrying a wet bag weighing approximately 8-12 pounds, with a radio turned to static (or some other obnoxious sound) playing loudly. (Eat cold food with one hand for dinner)

2. At 10PM, put the bag gently down, set the alarm for midnight, and go to sleep.
3. Get up at 12 and walk around the living room again, with the bag, until 1AM.
4. Set the alarm for 3AM.
5. As you can't get back to sleep, get up at 2AM and make a drink and watch an infomercial.
6. Go to bed at 2:45AM.
7. Get up at 3AM when the alarm goes off.
8. Sing songs quietly in the dark until 4AM.
9. Get up. Make breakfast. Get ready for work and go to work (work hard and be productive)
Repeat steps 1-9 each night. Keep this up for 3-5 years. Look cheerful and together.

Lesson 4
Can you stand the mess children make? To find out:
1. Smear peanut butter onto the sofa and jam onto the curtains.
2. Hide a piece of raw chicken behind the stereo and leave it there all summer.
3. Stick your fingers in the flower bed.
4. Then rub them on the clean walls.
5. Take your favorite book, photo album, etc. Wreck it.
6. Spill milk on your new pillows. Cover the stains with crayons. How does that look?

Lesson 5
Dressing small children is not as easy as it seems.
1. Buy an octopus and a small bag made out of loose mesh.
2. Attempt to put the octopus into the bag so that none of the arms hang out.
Time allowed for this - all morning.

Lesson 6
Forget the BMW and buy a mini-van. And don't think that you can leave it out in the driveway spotless and shining. Family cars don't look like that.
1. Buy a chocolate ice cream cone and put it in the glove compartment. Leave it there.
2. Get a dime. Stick it in the CD player.
3. Take a family size package of chocolate cookies. Mash them into the back seat. Sprinkle cheerios all over the floor, then smash them with your foot.
4. Run a garden rake along both sides of the car.

Lesson 7
Go to the local grocery store. Take with you the closest thing you can find to a pre-school child. (A full-grown goat is an excellent choice). If you intend to have more than one child, then definitely take more than one goat. Buy your week's groceries without letting the goats out of your sight. Pay for everything the goat eats or destroys. Until you can easily accomplish this, do not even contemplate having children.

Lesson 8
1. Hollow out a melon.
2. Make a small hole in the side.
3. Suspend it from t he ceiling and swing it from side to side.
4. Now get a bowl of soggy Cheerios and attempt to spoon them into the swaying melon by pretending to be an airplane.
5. Continue until half the Cheerios are gone.
6. Tip half into your lap. The other half, just throw up in the air. You are now ready to feed a nine- month-old baby.

Lesson 9
Learn the names of every character from Sesame Street , Barney, Disney, the Teletubbies, and Pokemon. Watch nothing else on TV but PBS, the Disney channel or Noggin for at least five years. (I know, you're thinking What's 'Noggin'?) Exactly the point.

Lesson 10
Make a recording of Fran Drescher saying 'mommy' repeatedly. (Important: no more than a four second delay between each 'mommy'; occasional crescendo to the
level of a supersonic jet is required). Play this tape in your car everywhere you go for the next four years. You are now ready to take a long trip with a toddler.

Lesson 11
Start talking to an adult of your choice. Have someone else continually tug on your skirt hem, shirt- sleeve, or elbow while playing the 'mommy' tape made from Lesson 10 above. You are now ready to have a conversation with an adult while there is a
child in the room.

to mom

When I read the following poem, I thought of my own Mom and how I learned to mother by observing thousands of daily gestures she performed for me, my siblings, and even perfect strangers. She didn't lecture or teach me to be a mother, she was just herself...and she is an amazing nurturer. I spoke today in church on the divine role of mothers. Loving and nurturing are so much a part of mothering and if I had to think of one thing that I have always felt from mom, that would be nurtured. Her level of constant love and sacrifice created a home environment that felt secure and it was always a place I wanted to be, even as a teenager. Mom was always there for Erin, Ryan, Brant and myself. As much as we tease her about her "equal" treatment, we do it because we know we have each received more love in our short years at home than others would experience in their entire lives. It's an incredible experience to be a mother. It's hard to be a mother. It's humbling to be a mother. It is divine to be a mother.


When You Thought I Wasn't Looking:
More than two decades ago, a young woman soon to graduate from college and get married reflected on her life and was filled with gratitude for the goodness and example of her mother. After praying for divine assistance to express in words her love and appreciation, Mary Rita Schilke Korzan wrote a poem titled “When You Thought I Wasn’t Looking” and dedicated it to her mother. Years later she was surprised to find the poem in a book with the words “author unknown.” Mary eventually unraveled the mystery of lost authorship, driven by a desire that those who read the poem would know the person who inspired it—her mother.

When you thought I wasn’t looking
You hung my first painting on the refrigerator
And I wanted to paint another.
When you thought I wasn’t looking
You fed a stray cat
And I thought it was good to be kind to animals.
When you thought I wasn’t looking
You baked a birthday cake just for me
And I knew that little things were special things.
When you thought I wasn’t looking
You said a prayer
And I believed there was a God that I could always talk to.
When you thought I wasn’t looking
You kissed me good-night
And I felt loved.
When you thought I wasn’t looking
I saw tears come from your eyes
And I learned that sometimes things hurt—
But that it's alright to cry.
When you thought I wasn’t looking
You smiled
And it made me want to look that pretty too.
When you thought I wasn’t looking
You cared
And I wanted to be everything I could be.
When you thought I wasn’t looking—
I looked . . .
And wanted to say thanks
For all those things you did
When you thought I wasn’t looking.¹

a parable

In preparing for my talk on Mother's Day (ahhhh!), I've stumbled upon a few gems. The following parable is definitely one of them. I have read and reread it and read it some more. It illustrates the type of mother I want to be.

Harold B. Lee said, "I have a great teacher with whom I live in my home, one with whom I counsel and with whom I pray. Her life has been one of teaching teachers of children. She gave me a parable that to me has great meaning:

I took a little child's hand in mine. He and 1 were to walk together for a while. I was to lead him to the Father. It was a task that overcame me, so awful was the responsibility. And so I talked to the child only of the Father. I painted the sternness of His face were the child to do something to displease Him. I spoke of the child's goodness as something that would appease the Father's wrath. He walked under the tall trees. I said the Father had power to send them crashing down, struck by His thunderbolts. We walked in the sunshine; I told him of the greatness of the Father, who made the burning, blazing sun. And one twilight we met the Father. The child hid behind me. He was afraid. He would not look up at the face so loving; he remembered my picture. He would not take the Father's hand; I was between the child and the Father. I wondered. I had been so conscientious, so serious.

I took a little child's hand in mine. I was to lead him to the Father. I felt burdened with a multiplicity of the things I had to teach him. We did not ramble, we hastened from one spot to another spot. At one moment we compared the leaves of the different trees; in the next we were examining a bird's nest. While the child was questioning me about it, I hurried him away to chase a butterfly. Did he chance to fall asleep I awakened him, lest he should miss something I wished him to see. We spoke to the Father, oh, yes, often and rapidly. I poured into his ears all the stories he ought to know, but we were interrupted often by the wind a-blowing, of which we must trace to its source. And then, in the twilight, we met the Father. The child merely glanced at Him and then his gaze wandered in a dozen directions. The Father stretched out his hand. The child was not interested enough to take it. Feverish spots burned in his cheeks. He dropped exhausted to the ground and fell asleep. Again I was between the child an the Father. I wondered. I had taught him so many things.

I took a little child's hand to lead him to the Father. My heart was full of gratitude for the glad privilege. He walked slowly. I suited my steps to the short steps of the child. We spoke of the things the child noticed. Sometimes we picked the Father's flowers and stroked their soft petals and loved their bright colors. Sometimes it was one of the Father's birds. We watched it build its nest. We saw the eggs that were laid. We wondered, elated at the care it gave its young. Often we told stories of the Father. I told them to the child and the child told them again to me. We told them, the child and I, over and over again. Sometimes we stopped to rest, leaning against one of the Father's trees, and letting His cool air cool our brows, and never speaking. And then, in the twilight, we met the Father. The child's eyes shone. He looked lovingly, trustingly, eagerly up to the Father's face. He put his hand into the Father's hand. I was for the moment forgotten. I was content.
—Author Unknown

Lazy Saturday

This has to be the most unpredictable weather year yet here in the Seattle area. From day to day it could be sunny, rainy, snowy, who knows. This past Saturday we had big plans for the day..mostly in the yard and around the house, but it was drizzly for most of the day. We all ended up staying in our pajamas until about four. I made these divine coconut macaroon pancakes for breakfast and the kids played, did some painting and ran around a lot. We listened to music and literally just hung out. Zig did a lot of furniture looking online and he was quite productive in that regard. I just had no motivation to do any of the things around the house that were needing attention. For once the day did not fly by so quickly. We were lucky when the sun finally peeked out to get about three hours outside in the evening working together. By that point, we all needed to get the blood flowing, so to speak.

the boy

It's been a hard and physically demanding past year just keeping Rollin safe and alive and our house somewhat intact but also so much fun! He is just the most amazing little guy and we all just adore him. In one moment he's fiercely independent doing all kinds of crazy things I never fathomed two year olds would even attempt. He tries to dress himself, puts his own shoes on, climbs fences, gets his own food, brushes his teeth puts himself both in and out of the bathtub/highchair, and the list goes on. He does many other things that terrify me (running half a mile to a busy road and getting picked up by a nice stranger while mommy died a thousand times inside). Then there is this tender side of him that just melts my heart. He is always ready for a good cuddle, hug or a big kiss for mommy. A couple of nights ago I just laid down with him instead of putting him in his bed (I think I was too tired) and he fell asleep in our bed. I woke up to him singing in his sleep in the middle of the night "twinkle twinkle little star." That is a sound I hope to fix in my memory forever. I just thought "this is it, these are the little gifts from above that make being a mother so amazing." Heaven is near. Yesterday, a similar thing happened, I heard him humming "I am a child of God" to himself as he fell asleep for his nap. He wasn't saying the words (he had his fingers in his mouth) but he didn't miss a note. I just stood by his door and smiled and felt such a deep sense of gratitude that I get to witness these sweet moments on a daily basis. I am truly blessed.

May Day!

Already to the close of another week. It's been a fast one here, trying to get caught up on life and organized a bit. I took Rollin to Home Depot yesterday and I'm pretty certain Disneyland couldn't have been more exciting to him. He kept saying "whoa MOM!" when we passed big tools or lawn mowers or the cranes they use to put things up high. I am constantly amazed at how different little boys are. He loves his lipstick and stuff, but man, trucks and diggers and especially airplanes really get him so excited. We picked up some bags of sand for his sand box and I almost got a hernia (if that's possible for girls) lifting the small bags in the car. They looked small but they were so heavy. I kept telling Rollin as I heaved each one in that I couldn't wait till he was big and strong and could help me lift this kind of stuff. He said "okay."

Sela and Nina asked our neighbor, Dana, if they could visit her horses so we walked down to the barn yesterday evening. She has a former dressage champion horse that competed in the Olympics and a gorgeous Thoroughbred. We planned a night next week for the girls to ride and Sela is looking very forward to it. Dana's horses are so much bigger than the ones she's been riding in her lessons.

It's been a rather lemony week around here. We have all these wonderful lemons from Tina's yard in California that we are finding lots of ways to use. Our favorite afterschool drink is a cherry lemonade icy. Super yummy. I also made lemon chicken and lemon viniagrette for a salad one night. I tried a new curry zucchini bread with lemon zest (my favorite zuke recipe so far). I made sweet potato pot pies this week which was another new recipe. I love pot pies, the ultimate comfort food.

The rest of my spare time this week has been working on the first grade art auction project, my music for primary (I bombed last week :), and my mother's day talk for next week. I look forward to getting these things behind me and just taking it easy.

Looks like spring is finally here.



May Day bouquet
Cherry Icy
Vicky and Beau Beau
Only three hours to go and the yard is mowed ;)